So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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