My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
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