i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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