just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
