ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Randomize
