the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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