Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
