Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Randomize