I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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