I only kidnapped one of them. chill
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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