is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
