He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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