Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
