were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
