Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you.
What!?!?! How are you txting?!
Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend.
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Randomize
