There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
