if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize