I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
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