T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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