Im at strip club and am horny
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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