Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize
