Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
