She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
My boob is missing a layer of skin
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
