Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize
