I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
Randomize
