Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
