It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
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