i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
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