Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
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