I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Is it penis luge time yet?
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
