My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Randomize
