Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
do nipples grow back?
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