i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
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