i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize
