i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
