The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize
