let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
