Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
