Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
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