Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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