he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Randomize
