this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
