I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
