We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
