There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Randomize