We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
