Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
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