So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Randomize
