How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
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