Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
