Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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