Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
