we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
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