Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
we made out on top of his cat.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Randomize